Wednesday, June 21, 2006

A View Of Bob Barker's Blues

I got my pets spayed, Bob. Aren't you proud of me?

Bob Barker is having a very good day.

He's smiling like he just won a showcase because of the actions of the Rhode Island state legislature. They are the first state in the nation to heed his plea to have your pet spayed or neutered - it's now a state law, with fines of $75 a month for cat and dog owners who fail to sterilize. A lack of funds is not an excuse either - the law includes subsidies for low-income pet owners. Farmers and state licensed breeders are exempt. The law was designed to help reduce the number of euthanasias performed because of animal shelter overcrowding.

He's also smiling because a feline menace has been spared the death penalty. Remember the story of Lewis, the baddest pussy on the East coast? He was due to be put to sleep because he was a menace in his Bridgeport area neighborhood, but a judge commuted his sentence to life with no parole - so to speak. If he's a good kitty, his record will be expunged.
I'm not making this up.

They say that cat is one bad mutha - shut yo mouth!

Bob's got love for the dogs, too. Take Belle, for example. This beagle did her best Lassie impression when she called 911 for her owner, a diabetic who suffered a seizure. "There's no doubt I'd be dead if I didn't have Belle," he said of his pooch - the first canine winner of the VITA Wireless Samaritan Award.

Now that's a good dog!

Still, Bob's smile hides some tears because of an incident that recently took place in St. Peters, Missouri. A 33 year old woman, angry that a Chihuahua puppy she bought - a four week old animal taken from its mother too soon according to her veterinarian - died, reportedly went back to the breeder to complain. Her attempts to get restitution included beating the breeder about the head with the dead puppy, trying to force her way into the breeder's home to get a new puppy, and (after being forced out the breeder's home) driving off while yelling threats out of her car window and waiving the dead puppy out of her sunroof.

I'm not making this up, either. Shame the Animal Cops weren't around to take her crazy ass (or the vet who let her leave the office with a dead puppy) to jail.

How come there aren't minimum requirements for pet ownership? There's a new cause for you to champion, Bob: Have your pet owner screened for psychological defects.

More to come later.

No animals were harmed in the creation of this post.


Anonymous mom said...

belle's owner should be very thankful that she didn't call 911 here in detroit, i can hear the operator now "stop playing on the phone before i send the police out there and you will really be in trouble, now put your owner on the phone so i can speak to him."

and as for poor lewis i guess he's just a menace to society.

your mama.

7:23 AM  
Blogger TEM said...

The police or the pound? Doesn't matter because our 911 operators wouldn't have sent either one. After reading Belle's story, I've come to the conclusion that my fuzzy bunch is sorely in need of some skills besides looking cute and lounging around. If something were to happen to me, all they'd do is stand over me with a look on their faces that said, "Um, so does this mean you aren't going to feed us?"

As for Lewis, he's the real king of the beasts - a real wildcat. Not too many felines locked up in the 9 Lives ward.

11:47 AM  

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